of paranoia and so many more.
i think i'm spiralling slightly. i don't think i am losing my weight fast enough. i still feel rather fat. i'm not sure what is going on.
not five minutes, ago i visited a friendster profile of one of my former classmates. don't like him that much, but he was really quite a nice person. anyway, he used to be this fat boy and now he has shed all the weight in army and i am battling weight issues! my heart is beating really fast. i am not sure how come but it's something to do with the fact that at this moment i can still feel my flab. i know it's still too early to actually see drastic results but i really feel fat. it's like i don't want to eat and just go exercise so as to increase the chances of losing more weight. i don't have the time now because of tuition lining up till 6pm. i think i'll be dead exhausted by the end. maybe later tonight.
i sense a slight paranoia in me these few days. natalia said it's normal and part of the side effects but honestly, i can do without it. it's making me feel a little anxious and irritable.
day three of taking the pill was crazy. as usual, i had my morning hot milo drink and went off to do my daily chores. halfway thru i got hungry and bought myself a curry puff and a stick of fishballs from old chang kee. boy was that a mistake. i felt so full, like as if i had just finished an entire ten course meal by myself. i felt nauseas like i wanted to vomit but can't. it's crazy. apart from those two guilty pleasures, my diet has been mostly liquid. which i think is quite bad since i'm getting bouts of blackouts here and there. i think that means low blood.
phil asked me to do him a favour last night. go out and get flowers for his mom and deliver it to his house. and i did. the things i do for him still. it's crazy. it's really nothing though. i mean friends do those things for one another right?
i hope i can lose the belly by the end of the month. nicolas emailed me on fridae. he wants to come over to singapore sometime late april. how is that even possible!? i need to lose the weight before he comes over. i'm afraid of rejections and i'm afraid of people not liking me. argh! just let me get by these hard times gracefully. please let me lose the weight. please. i need to shed all the fats.
not five minutes, ago i visited a friendster profile of one of my former classmates. don't like him that much, but he was really quite a nice person. anyway, he used to be this fat boy and now he has shed all the weight in army and i am battling weight issues! my heart is beating really fast. i am not sure how come but it's something to do with the fact that at this moment i can still feel my flab. i know it's still too early to actually see drastic results but i really feel fat. it's like i don't want to eat and just go exercise so as to increase the chances of losing more weight. i don't have the time now because of tuition lining up till 6pm. i think i'll be dead exhausted by the end. maybe later tonight.
i sense a slight paranoia in me these few days. natalia said it's normal and part of the side effects but honestly, i can do without it. it's making me feel a little anxious and irritable.
day three of taking the pill was crazy. as usual, i had my morning hot milo drink and went off to do my daily chores. halfway thru i got hungry and bought myself a curry puff and a stick of fishballs from old chang kee. boy was that a mistake. i felt so full, like as if i had just finished an entire ten course meal by myself. i felt nauseas like i wanted to vomit but can't. it's crazy. apart from those two guilty pleasures, my diet has been mostly liquid. which i think is quite bad since i'm getting bouts of blackouts here and there. i think that means low blood.
phil asked me to do him a favour last night. go out and get flowers for his mom and deliver it to his house. and i did. the things i do for him still. it's crazy. it's really nothing though. i mean friends do those things for one another right?
i hope i can lose the belly by the end of the month. nicolas emailed me on fridae. he wants to come over to singapore sometime late april. how is that even possible!? i need to lose the weight before he comes over. i'm afraid of rejections and i'm afraid of people not liking me. argh! just let me get by these hard times gracefully. please let me lose the weight. please. i need to shed all the fats.
posted by ryanstarr @ 8:00 AM
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